If
by dasher-x
Summary: Troy has feelings for his best friend and doesn't know how to tell him. Please RR, I love constructive criticism. Warning! slashy goodness obviously! If you don't like or approve, please don't read! TroyxChad. Sorry for the lousy formatting on the song.


_(A/N: Longer than the story I think! This is my first attempt at a HSM story that I'm willing to share. It could be a one-shot, but I might continue it. Don't know yet. I included a song I made up, and would love critique on that as well. This is HSM after all, so might as well have singing and I wanted to try my hand at coming up with lyrics to a song. It's obviously not a group song as Troy sings it alone in his room. You make up the music you think best fit's the lyrics. I know how it sounds in my head, but I have no idea how to translate that to a story and I'm not a song-writer by any stretch. Still, I'd love R&R on the story AND the song. Please note that although the characters are not mine in any way, and I have no affiliation with Disney or anyone to whom HSM belongs, the song is mine and mine alone, copyrighted by me, and I retain all rights to it. Having said that I would love suggestions on making the song a bit tighter so if you have any constructive criticism to bestow I will gladly take into account your suggestions and will credit you if I use them. P.S. I didn't put in a lot of descriptions of characters or setting because come on, we ALL know what they look like and where they are right?;) This is more about development.)_

Chad sat on the kitchen island eating an apple while Troy grabbed juice from the fridge.

"You were a little sloppy on the moves captain, I got four past you," Chad said, grabbing the glass of juice and downing it as soon as Troy turned to put the carton up.

"Hey!" Troy yelled, grabbing the glass and sloshing juice over both of them in the process, "First, that's mine, and second, you just got lucky and you know it."

Chad laughed and grabbed for the glass again, but Troy was ready for him this time and quickly finished it off.

"Luck had nothing to do with it, this is all pure skill," Chad said, running his hands down his sides for emphasis, "Besides, I think you were just distracted by a certain dark-haired honey's absence."

"Don't remind me," Troy groaned, filling the glass again and handing it to Chad.

Troy watched Chad drink, his eyes roaming over the glistening skin, still wet from the game. That creamy skin filled his thoughts and set his mind down too familiar paths. He blushed and quickly turned away to shut the fridge, hoping Chad hadn't caught him staring once again.

_Much safer if he thinks I__'__m distracted because of Gabriella, what__'__s wrong with me anyway? Chad__'__s like a brother! _He shook his head, trying to rid himself of the bothersome thoughts, or at least convince himself he didn't really feel that way about Chad. As usual it was no use, he just couldn't deny it or lie to himself any more. It was harder every day to pretend everything was normal. He felt a familiar hand on his shoulder and flinched before he could stop himself.

"Hey man, it's me, come on," Chad said, moving back and putting his hands up in the classic unarmed pose, "don't be so jumpy. She'll be back on Monday, it's just a week long thing right?"

"Yeah, sorry, I'm just not used to her being gone. We're always together, at least at school, and this week has been strange with her and Martha on that DC tour," Troy let a smile form, more from habit than happiness, "Only four more days to go. I'll be fine."

"Yeah you will," Chad grabbed Troy's hand in their familiar motion, slapping Troy on the shoulder, "Hey, did I tell you a certain hottie and I are going out tomorrow night? You know she wants me!"

Troy felt his stomach churn and his smile faltered briefly, but Chad was jumping back up on the island and didn't notice, "So Taylor's going to finally let you kiss her huh?" His stomach flipped again and he regretted the question before it left his lips, he just couldn't stop himself from asking.

"You know it!" Chad laughed, "All the honey's want this, but I'm saving it all for Taylor."

Troy turned and pretended to look through the fridge again, his eyes burning. He scrunched them tight, willing the shameful tears back. He couldn't let Chad see him crying.

"Hey Mrs. Bolton," he heard Chad's greeting and quickly wiped his eyes, checking for any wetness before his mother, or worse Chad, noticed.

"Hello Chad. Troy, find what you want and close the refrigerator please, don't stand there with the door open, ok sweetie?" she bent and kissed his cheek before continuing on through into the living room.

"Sorry mom," Troy said, closing the door and turning back to Chad looking slightly embarrassed.

Chad jumped down off the island, his easy laugh once again making Troy's heart jump. He grabbed Troy's shoulder and squeezed, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he leaned in and mimed kissing Troy's cheek.

"See ya tomorrow _sweetie,_" he chuckled as he left the house.

"Yeah, very funny!" Troy called after him. His heart was hammering in his chest. He ran to his room and watched out the window as Chad strode away. Troy's eyes misted over and the object of his secret desire became a blur in the shadows of the evening. His heart aching, Troy began to sing…

**(If You Only Knew- copyright 2007 Dasher-x-)**

You walk to school with me every day.

You come to my house and we play.

I'm just a teammate and a friend.

I hear you talk about your date with her,

and it makes my heart break again.

If you only knew

when I close my eyes

when I lie in bed

that you're in my head

In my dreams at night

your face I see

your lips so soft

as you're kissing me

if you only knew

I wanted to tell you how I feel tonight

but I keep my voice locked tight

so scared of what you'll say

You smile at her, will you laugh at me

Why does it have to hurt this way?

If you only knew

when I close my eyes

when I lie in bed

that you're in my head

In my dreams at night

your face I see

your lips so soft

as you're kissing me

If I could find the words

to speak my heart

Would our friendship

only fall apart?

Would you love me then

as I love you now

Would your heart rejoice

when you heard my vow?

Yeah yeah if you

only knew

when I close my eyes

when I lie in bed

that you're in my head

In my dreams at night

your face I see

your lips so soft

as you're kissing me

if you only knew..

if you only knew.

if you only knew.

(A/N again: _Maybe another chapter soon. We'll see how it goes and how it's received. This is obviously Chad/Troy, or Choy if you must, and I wrote it because I want to see more Chad/Troy and there isn't much out there that I can find. Angsty fluff isn't' it? Sorry if that's not your cup of tea, I was in a mood and it felt right for this story. If you like it and want more, you have to let me know!)_


End file.
